London diaries (redacted)
The Second Time You Do Anything
Going into my second semester abroad, I was at an extreme emotional crossroads; Overwhelming excitment, coupled with fear. To be honest I didn’t think I was ready to dive back in. Going into Barcelona, I didn’t know what to expect. Although I loved studying in Spain, I won't lie and say it was easy. It was one of the most emotionally challenging things I’ve ever had to go through. I never got to the point of feeling well adjusted, and spent many of my days desperately missing the people, places, and things I love about home.
The second time you do anything it is exceedingly hard to not compare two distinct experiences. For better or worse, I think I needed to go through Barcelona to get to London. My experience last fall healed me in ways I never could have imagined- it strengthened my relationship with my family, gave me some of my lifelong best friends, and walked me through the difficult transition from high school to adulthood. London on the other hand, threw me back out into the real world right when I needed it. It’s given me love, life, and so much energy!! More on this later.
My point in sharing this is that everyone has a different experience studying abroad, even those who have done it twice. You never know what awaits on the other side of the pond!
First Impressions
My first impressions of London were a bit less glamorous. The nearly two hour bus ride from Heathrow to our quaint neighborhood in North London had me questioning my entire decision to come abroad. Much to my surprise, the beautiful brownstones and colorful houses of Notting Hill are not the reality of most of the city. One thing I would *later* learn about London is that everyone commutes. The average commute time in London is over an hour, and as a homebody, that shook me to my core. While it takes me about an hour to get into the city center for class, I’ve learned to love my commute and use the time to observe and reflect. I’ve even learned to love my neighborhood and the local spots that exist outside of Zone 1.
I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, a sentiment that was quickly reaffirmed within the first week of being here. On a random night out in SoHo, my friends happened to pick up a group of British boys literally off the side of the road. The next night, I walked into my kitchen and locked eyes with fate himself.
Every week since then, my friends and I have been spending *a lot* of time with this particular group of Brits. We have fun! Lots of it. More than that, our relationships with these boys have provided us a unique lens through which we can observe the cultural differences between our experiences in the United States and here in England. I’ve noticed that dating culture over here is definitely more equal, which is a tradeoff I am happy to make for men who are thoughtful and kind. Unlike the 19 year olds I know back home, morals and manners seem to be the standard for British boys (or at least ours). Happy to finally be in a culture where men dont see feminism as a joke, or guns as a sign of manliness. And let me tell you, I am having so much fun going on real dates-whether it’s strolling Camden market, sharing a bottle of wine at the local pub, going dancing, or attending a concert at Drumsheds. I always knew dating *should* be fun, but never could’ve imagined the world that exists outside the four confined walls of a college town apartment.
Been Doing Good
I always thought that coming abroad meant I had to sacrifice everything about my life at home, an anecdote that couldn't be further from the truth. While there are small lifestyle changes that I think are for the better (writing the date as day/month/year, calling trash “rubbish”), I’ve found that the more I try to preserve the routines I cherish at home, the better I’ve been able to acclimate to the big changes I’m simultaneously undergoing. It’s the one thing I didn’t get right in Barcelona, and the one thing I’ve struggled to maintain throughout the tumultuous highs and lows of young adulthood.
My efforts to preserve my sanity have not been in vain; luckily, my neighborhood has become my personal sanctuary, a pocket of peace amidst the hustle and bustle of the big city. It’s all very reminiscent of the best parts of my life at home; in the mornings, I walk to the most perfect yoga and pilates studio not five minutes away from my house. I grab a breakfast roll at this delicious cafe next door. I do my homework in the cute coffee shop across the street from my house. I walk around the playing fields and call my mom.
Still, my life couldnt be more different. I order a martini with dinner and indulge in afternoon tea. I wear little black dresses and go to dimly lit jazz bars. I read books in parks and on the train. I engage in meaningful conversations and midnight rendezvous. Still grasping at the last glimmers of teenage bliss, yet standing on the edge of a new eternity; to be 19 years old in London is a magical thing. For the first time in my life, I can confidently say I am uttlerly, completely, fully and entirely happy.
I’ve spent most of my life wishing, waiting, hoping for the love I’ve always dreamed of to come into my life and sweep me off my feet. I never expected it to come at me all at once, from every direction. While this experience is temporary, I know now that this is the feeling I will spend the rest of my life chasing. What a special thing!!!
With love,
EHB x
